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By Nomalanga Mhlauli-Moses
Singer Cee Lo Green is the target of an investigation surrounding the s*xual assault of an unnamed woman and while the investigation is still in its early stages, the singer has already spoken about it. Green, who’s real name is Thomas DeCarlo Callaway, is claiming that he is being falsely accused.
The problem with cases like this is that even though they usually get “resolved” in court, no one ever really knows what the actual truth was because there are typically only two people in the room at the time of an “assault” and the stories that the two people usually tell are as different as night and day.
What we know is that there is a woman who claims that Cee Lo a*******d her. We also know that the incident happened a few months ago but the women only just recently made the accusations. While we can not know for sure exactly what happened, based on what we know so far, we can actually come up with four of the most likely scenarios.
1. Cee Lo forced a woman to do “something” that she did want to do and now she wants justice.
While this women waited some months to report what happened to her, if she was indeed attacked like she said she was, reporting the singer is the right thing to do, even if it has taken a suspiciously long time.
The reason why this may have happened is that unfortunately, money, which I imagine Mr. Green has a huge pile of, has a tendency of distorting people’s reality. This has a tendency of happening more drastically when there is too much of it in said person’s bank account. It is quite possible that Mr. Green may have assumed that because he can buy almost anything that he wants, a woman that he has decided he wants does not have the right to tell him that he can not have what he wants…*wink, wink.
2. Cee Lo and the woman had “relations”. She enjoyed his money and now he’s c*t her off.
In this scenario, Cee Lo and this woman were involved in a relationship of some sort and the relationship was c*t short-by him. Now, since we are all grownups, lets get honest for a minute, shall we? While I imagine Mr. Green is a sweet and loving man, if you get to know him, I think we can all agree he is not going to be on the cover of People Magazine with the title of “S*xiest Man Alive”. So, a smart and beautiful gold-digger might get into a relationship with Mr. Green where, even though they never actually say it out loud, he enjoys her “beauty” while she enjoys the occasional dollar that floats from his huge pile of cash and on to her much, much smaller pile.
The problem with these kinds of “arrangements” is that there is always the danger of the woman spotting someone with a bigger pile of cash and taking her beauty there or the guy with the pile of cash may decide that he no longer wishes to enjoy her “beauty”. This is the point at which we then read headlines such as that of Cee Lo “assaulting” a woman that he has not seen in months. It may just be that she misses him (read:his cash) and saying he a*******d her is a nice way of arranging a reunion with him and his cash.
3. There was a Misunderstanding
Sometimes when a woman takes a little glance at man, he perceives that she took a glance because she saw something that she liked-him. And sometimes when a woman casually has a conversation about something as random as the weather with a man, that man assumes that the reason why the woman is talking to him is not that she is just friendly, but is actually looking to be “friendly”, at a private location later on. Of course, most women know that a glance could just be a glance and friendly conservation could just be that, but some men don’t know that. If Cee Lo is one of those men who does not know that sometimes a glance is just a glance, there is a possibility that he could have misread the anonymous woman’s friendliness for something more and acted on that error. This is where things typically get tricky.
There are women who can be approached by a “friendly” man and if they are not interested, they just say “no, thank you” and carry on with their lives. There are also women who will respond to the exact same scenario by saying “no’” and then also going to the authorities to report the “friendly” man. Maybe Cee Lo was just being “friendly” and now he is about to regret ever having even looked at the girl who glanced at him.
4. The Woman is crazy or crazy for money
If we are to entertain the notion that Cee Lo could be completely guilty of what he is being investigated for, we have to also consider that he could be entirely innocent. Maybe this unnamed woman is just crazy and is accusing poor Cee Lo of something that he did not do. Maybe this anonymous woman is one of those lazy gold-diggers who doesn’t even bother to trying to win over her target with her charms but would rather just cry foul and hope that she stirs up enough trouble that someone will pay her to go away.
Like I said, before, we will probably never know exactly what happened between Cee Lo and the anonymous woman. While the above scenarios are all quite likely, they are obviously not a graduate degree level analysis of what may have happened. That being said, if the women was actually a*******d, it is absolutely not a laughing matter and I am sad and disappointed that the man we have welcomed into our homes as the adorable judge on the reality show, “The Voice”, is actually a man who wold attack a woman.
Nomalanga helps Black Women thrive in their lives and careers. She is a Social Commentator, an Editor at Your Black World , Assistant Professor of Professional Studies and the reigning Mrs Botswana. Visit Nomalanga’s blog at successfulblackwoman.com